Reality check

Last night was really embarrassing.  Like I want to hid my head in shame kind of embarrassing.  Caroline had an activity that parents were invited too, but it was a little more geared to moms and daughters.  Shawn had journal club and would just pick the boys up from the church on his way home.  I thought that would be fine, and I didn't want to miss out because Caroline is already probably going to miss out on the father daughter dance since Shawn is on call then.  So we get into the van and arrive at the church.  Just keep in mind I have food on my shirt from dinner, don't have any makeup on.  So the lesson starts and the girls leaders start talking about inner beauty and all that good stuff.  Lots of moms are getting choked up and all I can focus on is a terrible smell that is coming from Devin's direction.  He had some very bad gas and every 5 minutes it smelled like rotten eggs.  Not exactly fitting for the environment we are in.  Then about 15 minutes in to people talking Devin says, "This is boring."  loud enough for everyone to hear.  He also keeps accidentally turing the light off with his huge melon like head.  So I'm feeling like maybe this wasn't the best idea to bring the boys to this activity.  Then we go into the hallway to write nice notes on pictures of the girls that were taken earlier.  I thought it would be great to have the boys walk around, well while I was walking around looking at the pictures I see Graham punch one of the pictures in the face, because I guess that's what a 4 year old feels is appropriate to do.  So I grab him and put him in timeout at the end of the hall and tell him to stay there. So for about 30 seconds I have some time to catch my breath, then he looks at the wall and decided that it was a good time to turn off the lights, right while people are trying to write on poster boards.  At that point I just put him outside the church.  I could still see him and was right on the other side of the door but I felt it was the safest place for him at the moment.  For whatever reason I couldn't take it anymore and just broke down.  And once tears start coming I don't have the right balance of hormones at the moment to stop them.  I looked like a mess, remember food on my shirt and no make up on. Luckily Shawn arrived about 2 minutes later and told me to just take the boys and leave so I could get myself together.  I cried the entire way home, and laughed a little too because come on its kind of funny, but mainly cried.  I felt so bad I couldn't do one thing with just me and Caroline and realized its just going to get a lot crazier seeing as we are adding yet another boy into the mix here.  I really felt bad for her being the only girl and living around smelly, crazy, little brothers.  So Shawn knowing I was not doing well suggested I take Caroline out for frozen yogurt when they got home.  He's my hero, I have the best husband ever.  The second they got in the drive way I jumped in the car and we had a great time just the two of us.  It was just what I needed.  We had a great time and told her to make sure she tells me when she needs a little girl time because I probably need it just as much as she does.  Note to self, never EVER, bring little boys to a lesson on inner beauty, its just not their thing!